My Heart

Above all else, guard your heart,for everything you do flows from it. ~ Proverbs 4:23

Guarding my heart has not been my strong suit....I'm a honest person, so I take people for their word...period. I sometimes play like things don't bother me or I don't care...when deep down I really do. If I'm tough on the outside they won't know how I'm really feeling in the inside. 

So giving my heart to God is the only way to guard my heart. To protect my heart I have to be obedient and submissive to The Lord's voice and will. I need to stop...to be still and let him lead the way...

Here and now, I lay my life and my heart before You. Please give me the discernment to know when it is safe for me to let someone into my heart. Please make my heart ready to accept and love who You place in my heart. Only allow someone who lives for and loves You with all that he has and all that he is to enter into my heart. I trust in you O'Lord with my life, my heart, my everything. Let the words that come from my mouth bless and not curse. Let the thoughts in my mind be pure. Let the desires of my heart be the desires You have given me. Let me rest in Your peace with my head on your chest knowing you love me enough to protect me all the days of my life. 

Be Not of This World

After a twenty minute discussion with my ex about what is appropriate or not for our daughter to wear to school my eyes were opened even wider to the issue of the world fighting against who we were created to be. Ugh!!

The "inappropriateness" of this outfit was nothing more than "that girl made fun of her" and "I don't want her getting labeled". Well, hello world!  We all get labels from others!!  The key is not to let those labels stick!  We are not who the world tells us we are...we are who God created us to be and walking in that truth is one the greatest weapons you have against the enemy. See, God saw who you were even before you were conceived here on earth. He has a plan for your life that is far greater than you can even begin to imagine. He knitted you in your mothers womb. You are not a mistake...you are fearfully and wonderfully made by God Himself. 

Don't let others decide on who you are...that isn't their decision to make. 

Don't fear what others may think or say about who you are....ask yourself who does God say that I am??  

Walk in the joy of knowing that you have a Heavenly Father who loves you exactly for who you are right now!!  Once you have that truth in your heart and you know who you belong to and it only matters what He says of you, will you find the freedom of being who you were created to be!

Behind The Scenes

The enemy plots to ruin us in ways that are unknown to us...throughout our life he plants little seeds that he hopes to water here and there with drops of doubt, fear, hurt, pain until those very seeds have overgrown into vines so intertwined into our being that there is no way to be set free from them. These vines hold us captive from reaching for and accomplishing our original destiny. What the enemy doesn't realize is that we have a Father who pursues us and wants us to fulfill that destiny he has planned for us.   Our Father is relentless in his pursuit of our hearts.  He keeps tugging at us in ways He knows will get our attention.  If He has to remove all other things (idols) in your life to reveal Himself to you, He will.  The question is, will we hear and answer His call?

If you choose to answer His call, He will take you on a life long journey to remove the root to those vines, so you can be set free. Only in His freedom can you find rest.  The freedom that gives you peace, the freedom that gives you courage, the freedom that brings you joy, the freedom that gives you new life.  There is no cost for this freedom, He has already paid for it in advance.

A vine was revealed to me earlier this week, I wasn't searching for it but my Father knew it had to be seen and cut away before I could attain the next step in my journey with Him.  Here's to letting go and letting the healing begin....it all happens behind the scenes...

Hallmark Channel ~ Happily Ever After

Originally written late Spring 2015

Maybe it's the hopeless romantic inside of me...

Maybe it's a desire my heart was given when I was a young girl...

Maybe it's something every girl dreams of...

Everlasting...never-failing...happily ever after...

Does the this type of love exist beyond Hallmark Romance movies?

Or is it only a fairy tale?

Growing old together...leaning on one another through the years...to be known, loved & accepted just the way you are...

KENYA

I felt this 2 1/2 years ago...a calling to go but I wasn't sure if that "call" was from You or from my own selfish desires...there was a link but I didn't want to go because of that...

Another season less than a year ago I felt a prompting...but knew it wasn't the right time or destination. 

Here I am...I heard you call me again...this time it's the right place and the right time. I've received a few subtle confirmations...but nothing overwhelmingly concrete. I want to go...the reason is to serve You, to glorify You, to share the love You've bestowed upon me. There is no selfish motive...no link to anyone. A chance to freely be ME...who You've created ME to be. I'm expectantly waiting for Your final confirmation...the phone call or email that says I've been chosen to GO. 

I'm ready and I'm waiting...

You Are Never Alone

Learning to do single parenthood isn't an easy road. Sometimes it can leave you feeling like the "Dolly for Sue" on the "Island of Misfit Toys".  There I sat again by myself really not knowing anyone but my ex, his wife and my previous in laws. Feeling very alone and very out of place....a definite fish out of the water. 

In this state of extreme discomfort my mind wanted to run it's course of the countless fears I was experiencing in that moment but then it happened...the runaway train I had boarded was halted in it's tracks. I heard Him whisper to me...you are never alone...I am always here with you but there are times you forget and let the father of lies come and sit with you instead of Me. In an instant my focus was completely changed. I needed to have my eyes opened and realize He was there, right beside me all along. I made it through the concert and was able to walk through the sea of strangers with confidence knowing my Father never left my side. He empowered me with His grace and love to conquer my fears. 

There are obstacles you will learn to overcome as time goes by. Some are easier than others to embrace. Just remember this...you are never alone, for He is always with you. 

My Daughter's Heart

I read the attached article the other night and I couldn't help but to cry out to Jesus....not on my behalf but for my precious daughters. It's not that they don't have an earthly daddy who loves them but I do know that he doesn't show them a love like this.

http://www.becomegoodsoil.com/the-question-every-daughter-is-asking/

Over the past several years I've learned about a Father that loves me, adores me & wants to be everything for me. This is the Father I want my girls to know. No judgement, no condemnation, always loving them no matter what the circumstances ....fully & completely. 

It's my call as mother and as a child of God to invite them to know Him...to go to Him and ask Him to reveal Himself to each of their hearts.

I pray that God would bless their hearts with an example of a father like that here on earth...one that sees the beauty within them, one who could come alongside them and inspire, encourage, love them for who they are...for the girl God created them to be...

My youngest daughter drew this picture just the other day...the flowers represent each one of us...the one on the end is very special...the one where there is a name yet to be known...that special flower...that special place...is reserved for the man God will bless her life with as her stepfather...she's revealing her desires for her heart and our lives...